The "Mother" Session Log

Session #8: Patient [XXXXXXXX XXXXX]

Psychologist

So you decided to come.

[XXXXXXXX]

Didn't give me much of a choice did you. 

Psychologist

The choice was always yours. Coming to this session just made the most sense, that's all.

[XXXXXXXX]

I don't know how to trust you anymore. You aren't supposed to have an ulterior motive. Why didn't you show me those scans earlier?

Psychologist

You weren't ready yet. I told you. Your mind was more fragile than you think. Seeing the Dream again, I was worried it might throw you off. 

[XXXXXXXX]

Okay, well. I'm here now. And I want you to tell me what I'm missing. 

Psychologist

I will. If you promise to discuss the final part of the Dream with me. 

[XXXXXXXX]

If that's what it will take, fine.

Psychologist

Good. We have an understanding.

In the Dream, what was it like when you met her?

[XXXXXXXX]

Calm. Peaceful. At the center, there was so much beauty. I walked towards the house, and I heard her sing. Was that really her?

Psychologist

Does it really matter, when you can't tell the difference?

[XXXXXXXX]

I don't know. I'm not sure anymore.

Psychologist

To me, that answer is no. Objectively, that was not her in there. We can prove it was all in your mind. But what matters more to me is what you got out of it. What changed about you having that conversation with her. You must realize that real is not as important as you may want it to be.

 

What happened when you walked in?

 

[XXXXXXXX]

She was making food. I smelled it first. Like I said, I heard her singing as well. It was something my Dad had told me about, that she had a good singing voice.

Psychologist

The first things you noticed about her were the surface level details. The ones your Dad told you. That makes sense, as you never knew her as a person well enough to know the nuances of her character. 

[XXXXXXXX]

I mean, I guess that could be one way to interpret that. But then we spoke together, and she looked different than any picture that my Dad had shown me. Older. Like she had spent the last sixteen years in that house, waiting for me.

Psychologist

Your mind was filling in the gaps in your knowledge for you.

[XXXXXXXX]

Okay sure.

Psychologist

What did you discuss?

[XXXXXXXX]

We talked about that night. The night I was born. She helped me get over the guilt I had been carrying, all this emotional weight. She lifted it from me. She knew things about my life, she knew how I was doing, she knew who I had grown up to be. She was so real, she had to be real. Or else how can I have made peace with what happened?

Psychologist

It sounds like you already did though. Deep down, you wanted to forgive yourself for your mother's passing, you just didn't know it. It it still completely valid. It doesn't have to have come from your mother from beyond the grave for it to be something real to hold on to. You forgave yourself, and made peace. That is a gift you need to hold on to, real or not. I'm sure your mother would want that for you.

[XXXXXXXX]

How would you know anything about my mother?

Psychologist

Because that's what I would want for Jason, if he was in the situation you had been in. That's what any mother wants for their child, to be free of burden and restraint, and to live a life happy. Something that my Jason will never have now.

[XXXXXXXX]

Because of his illness.

Psychologist

Yes.

[XXXXXXXX]

He's like me isn't he. Stuck in the Dream. Except he never woke up. He never got out.

Psychologist

Unfortunately yes. My son was ripped away from me by this Dream, this disease, this infection. My purpose is to make sure that no one else suffers the same fate, by understanding as much as I can about it, understanding why it is happening, and find a way to stop it by any means necessary. 

We don't know much about it, but there are some shared elements between cases, like the storm for instance. But most parts are personalized as far as I can tell.

As well, the Dream is easier fully realized by someone who has been through great trauma, whether psychological or physical.

[XXXXXXXX]

We?

Psychologist

You are the first to successfully wake. Out of every study I have tracked. I've only had these images up until now.

*she pulls out more brain scan images

 

-Editor

 

 These were Jason's.

[XXXXXXXX]

This looks like the same storm definitely.

Psychologist

It is. 

[XXXXXXXX]

What does any of it mean then?

Psychologist

Nothing, for you. You've survived. While objectively nothing supernatural happened to you within the dream, the outcome having resulted in your mitigation of trauma is remarkable. A gift to cherish. Whatever happened to you in there you need to hold on to. 

For the rest of us. I don't know. I don't know if we can all do what you did. We might all be doomed to live a life like my son, stuck in that storm.

[XXXXXXXX]

I don't know what to believe anymore. 

Psychologist

Believe what you want. I can't stop you from that. All I tried to do was give you more of the complete picture. It's up to you to take from it what you wish.

I'd like to clear you now. I think there is no more reason to continue these sessions.

I do want to ask you one more thing. While the Dream is personalized, it might be important to know this. How did you get out?

[XXXXXXXX]

I ran. Back out through the storm, to the other side. I didn't want to go back into it. I mostly wanted to stay there, with my mother and my father in this new world. But I couldn't do it. So I got up and ran out. 

The next thing I know I was falling into a great void and then I woke up.

Psychologist

Temptation is tricky.

[XXXXXXXX]

You said that already.

Psychologist

Be wary of the Dream, [SXmXnXXa]. And live your life happy as your mother would have wanted you to live it.

[XXXXXXXX]

I don't think I ever want to see you again.

Psychologist

And I would say the same to you. Goodbye.

[XXXXXXXX]

Goodbye.

*end of excerpts

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